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Episode Yakity-Sax
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[birds tweeting]
[rustling]
[honk!]
[birds fluttering]
Fluttershy: Huh? [gasps] Some poor creature's in trouble! We have to help it! Oh, listen to that suffering! It must be in horrible agony!
[dissonant music]
[screech]
Fluttershy: Ooh! It sounds like a herd of injured chimerae! [pants] Or it's Cerberus with snifflitis in two of its heads and kennel cough in its third. Or maybe it's—
[screech]
[dissonant music continues]
Fluttershy: Pinkie Pie?
[music stops]
Pinkie Pie: Thaaaaaaaat's me! And a-one, and a-two, and a-I know what to do! [inhales deeply]
[dissonant music resumes]
Fluttershy: Ugh. At least no animal is suffering. Right, Angel?
[plop]
Fluttershy: [laughs nervously] Well, until now.
[theme song]
[dissonant music]
[ponies screaming]
Mane Six except Pinkie Pie: [scream, groan]
Applejack: What is that thing?
Twilight Sparkle: It's called a yovidaphone. It's from Yakyakistan, where it's actually quite popular.
Rainbow Dash: Is it supposed to sound like that?
Twilight Sparkle: Not exactly. It's known to produce a fairly complicated, melodically rich, and harmonious tone.
[bird chirping]
[bird squawks]
[music continues]
Rainbow Dash: Are you sure we're talking about the same thing?
[blare!]
[music ends]
Pinkie Pie: [panting] Phew! And that's with only a few days of practice! Can you believe it?!
[honk!]
Rarity: Yes. Yes, I can.
Applejack: I can honestly say I've never heard anything like it in my life.
Pinkie Pie: Well, if you enjoyed listening to my playing half as I enjoyed playing my playing, then I should totally play more! That way, we'll be even!
Twilight Sparkle: Oh, I don't think that's necessary, Pinkie.
Rest of the Mane Six: [agreeing]
Rainbow Dash: Please. Don't.
Pinkie Pie: There's a chance I may have missed a note or two here or there, but I just love playing so much! [sighs] You complete me.
Twilight Sparkle: Well, I, for one, am glad you're having so much fun with your new hobby.
Pinkie Pie: [not listening] Uh-huh. Sure.
Twilight Sparkle: And it's great that you're learning a new skill, and... and you're just waiting for me to finish talking so you can start playing again, aren't ya?
Pinkie Pie: No! But if you're done... And a-one, and a-two, and a-I know what to do! [inhales deeply]
[dissonant music resumes]
Fluttershy: [sighs, to Angel Bunny] It's okay. She's gone.
Applejack: Anypony else think that sounded like an apple core cut up in a pulp grinder?
Rarity: Apple-solutely! Uh, absolutely.
Twilight Sparkle: Okay, so maybe she isn't good yet. But she's our friend, and we should be supportive.
Applejack: She just started playin'. She's bound to get better. Right?
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, we just need to be supportive of her practicing... [groans] So the getting-better part happens as fast as possible.
Rest of the Mane Six: [agreeing]
[yovidaphone plays]
Rarity: Aah! Aah! [sighs]
[animals snoring quietly]
[bird whistling snore]
Pinkie Pie: [inhales deeply]
[yovidaphone plays]
[animals crying]
[crowd cheering]
Pinkie Pie: [inhales deeply]
[yovidaphone plays]
[thud]
[yovidaphone plays]
[splattering]
Twilight Sparkle: [sighs] You're absolutely right, Spike. Sometimes it is nice to get out of the library and be in the sun.
Spike: Especially when you take the library with you.
Twilight Sparkle: [chuckles]
[screech]
Applejack: [burbles, sighs] We need to do somethin' about Pinkie Pie's playin'!
Rainbow Dash: Like, now!
Fluttershy: [snoring]
Twilight Sparkle: Is it really that bad?
Rainbow Dash: Does this answer your question?
Twilight Sparkle: Uh, a trophy?
Rainbow Dash: For second place. Second! Place! All because of Pinkie's playing!
Rarity: And I wanted to turn heads with my new fall line, but not like this! [sobbing]
Applejack: And thanks to her fruit-blastin' melodies, I got an orchard full of nothin' but applesauce! And it ain't even saucin' season!
Rarity: And just look what her playing did to poor Fluttershy!
Fluttershy: [snores, gasps] Oh. So very tired. [yawning] It practically took me all night to get the nursery back to sleep. [resumes snoring]
Applejack: I mean, I know we said we should all be supportive, but Pinkie's been playin' for moons now, and she's not gettin' any better.
Rainbow Dash: Yeah! If anything, she's gotten worse!
Twilight Sparkle: Okay, maybe we can just pretend she's really good, and then I'll find a spell that will—
Applejack: Oh, no, no, no! We're not goin' through that again! Remember how well it worked out when you weren't honest with Celestia about her actin' ability?
Twilight Sparkle: [groans] You're right. We'll just have to tell Pinkie Pie she's not very good at the yovidaphone.
[yovidaphone plays]
[ponies screaming]
Rarity: Well, there's no time like the present.
[music stops]
Pinkie Pie: Phew! Huh, that's weird. I coulda sworn this place was packed a second ago. Hey, guys! Can I favor you all with a tune? I take requests!
Applejack: Actually, we do have a request, and yeah, it involves your yovidaphone.
Pinkie Pie: You mean the thing I love more than anything else in Equestria? My sun, my moon, my stars, my everything? Ooh! Tell me, tell me, tell me!
Applejack: All right. In all honesty... Uh, in all honesty... Rarity has somethin' to say!
Rarity: Pinkie, please listen to Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash: Ugh, fine! So, Pinkie, remember when we all were shocked to discover Princess Celestia wasn't so good at acting?
Pinkie Pie: Yeah, she was awful! But that's kind of a random thing to bring up. I thought you wanted to talk about my yovidaphone playing.
Rainbow Dash: Well, it's, uh... It's just... You need to know, uh... Twilight?
Twilight Sparkle: [sighs] Pinkie, we all support you, but we're afraid you're just not good at the yovidaphone, and none of us want you to waste your time on something you can't do well.
Pinkie Pie: Oh. [upbeat] Why didn't you just say so?
[air deflating]
Rainbow Dash: [sighs] We were all really nervous to tell you.
Pinkie Pie: Why? It's just a silly instrument. Well, lunch break's over. Gotta get back to the bakery. Those apple turnovers aren't gonna apple themselves! [whistles gleefully] No more yovidaphone playing for me-e-e!
[door closes]
Fluttershy: Wow. She took that so much better than I thought.
[trash can creaking]
[honk!]
Pinkie Pie: [sadly] No more yovidaphone playing for me. And a-one, and a-two, and I don't know what to do. [crying]
[indistinct conversations]
Twilight Sparkle: [sighs] Another beautiful day in Ponyville.
Spike: Uh, Twilight, when was the last time you saw Pinkie Pie?
Twilight Sparkle: Hmmm, not since we told her to stop playing the yovidaphone. I'm still surprised with how well she took it.
Spike: I don't think she took it as well as you think she took it.
Daisy: Top of the morning to ya!
Pinkie Pie: Is it morning? I hadn't noticed.
Twilight Sparkle: That's not good.
Rainbow Dash: There you are! We've been looking all over for you!
Rarity: It turns out Pinkie may not have taken our critique of her yovidaphone playing in the spirit with which it was intended.
Twilight Sparkle: I saw.
[shriveling]
[shade closing]
Spike: There's gotta be something we can do.
Twilight Sparkle: I'm sure there is, Spike. We just have to figure out what.
Rainbow Dash: [sighs] I don't get it. So she's no good at playing the yovidaphone. What's the big deal? There are so many other things she's really good at doing.
Applejack: Yeah! Not bein' able to play the yovidaphone is nothin' compared to all the things she can do well.
Twilight Sparkle: And that's exactly what we'll show her! I bet if we get her to do the stuff she likes and is good at doing, she'll cheer right back up and forget all about the yovidaphone.
Applejack: Hoo-whee! That's a great idea!
[air squeaks, hisses]
Rarity: Let's get started. Apparently, there's not a moment to lose.
[music]
[tea pouring]
[clink]
[animals chittering]
Fluttershy: [slurps]
[bubbling]
[thud]
[weak party cannon squeak]
[party cannon squeak]
Pinkie Pie: [sighs]
[air hissing]
Rainbow Dash: [laughs, groans]
[spraying and popping]
Pinkie Pie: [sneezes]
[mirror shattering]
Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Fluttershy: [sigh]
Twilight Sparkle: So, I'm guessing nopony had any success?
Applejack: [sighs] My party cannon idea was a real dud.
Rainbow Dash: Don't blame yourself. None of us did any better.
Twilight Sparkle: Well, not to worry. I came up with the perfect solution. Instead of trying to remind her what she's good at, we'll remind her what she's best at. And that's being our friend. We're gonna throw her a Pinkie Pie Appreciation Party!
Fluttershy: That's a wonderful idea! If anypony needs to know how much she's appreciated, it's Pinkie Pie.
Rainbow Dash: We can get the whole town involved, just so she can see what a good friend she is to everypony.
Twilight Sparkle: Then I hereby officially declare today Pinkie Pie Appreciation Day!
Rest of the Mane Six: [cheer]
[various party noises]
Rarity: Now this is perfection!
Rainbow Dash: Yeah! If anything could help Pinkie Pie cheer up and make her forget about her yovidaphone, this is definitely it!
Applejack: Sure is! Okay, who's gonna get her?
Twilight Sparkle: No need. Gummy's on it. In fact, there he is now!
[dragging noise]
[thump]
[beat]
Applejack: Uh, Gummy? You were supposed to bring Pinkie Pie. What happened?
Gummy: [blinks slowly]
Rarity: Is she still coming?
[beat]
Twilight Sparkle: Fluttershy, can you understand what he's saying?
Fluttershy: I could... if he was talking.
Spike: Let me try something. [slowly, loudly, and deliberately] Gummy! Where is Pinkie Pie?!
[splat]
Twilight Sparkle: Maybe we should just go and get her.
[magic zap]
[party horn]
Applejack: What in tarnation is goin' on here?!
Rarity: This decor is dreadful.
Rainbow Dash: And all of Pinkie's stuff is... gone?!
Rarity: It is a puzzle.
Maud Pie: [deadpan] Excuse me.
Rarity: Oh, yes, of course.
Twilight Sparkle: Um, Maud? Can I ask you a question?
Maud Pie: [deadpan] You just did.
Applejack: Well, can I ask you a question?
Maud Pie: [deadpan] You just did.
Rainbow Dash: [groans] Fine! How about if I ask you a— Wait.
Rarity: Oh, for goodness' sakes! Maud. All of your sister's things are gone. Explain.
Maud Pie: [deadpan] No, they're not. They're right here.
Fluttershy: Have you seen Pinkie Pie?
Maud Pie: Lots of times. I grew up with her.
[cart rumbling]
Twilight Sparkle: Okay, let's try this a different way. Why did you pack up all of Pinkie's things?
Maud Pie: [deadpan] She asked me to.
Rest of the Mane Six: What?!
Maud Pie: [deadpan] Pinkie told me to pack up her room and take everything to the rock farm.
Rest of the Mane Six: What?!
Maud Pie: [deadpan] She said she wouldn't need them since she's moving to Yakyakistan.
Rest of the Mane Six: What?!
Rarity: Terribly sorry, Maud. Must've misheard you. It almost sounded like you said Pinkie's [chuckling] moved to Yakyakistan!
Applejack: Uh, Rarity? She did say that.
Rarity: Uh, terribly sorry, Applejack. Must've misheard you. It almost sounded like you said [chuckling] she did say that!
Twilight Sparkle: Maud, I don't understand. Why would Pinkie leave Ponyville?
Rainbow Dash: Yeah! Why would she want to go live with the yaks?
Maud Pie: [deadpan] She said without the yovidaphone, her life had no meaning, and at least in Yakyakistan, she could listen to the masters play. She hoped that would give her some semblance of happiness.
Rarity: Well, no! No-no-no-no-no-no-no! That will not do!
Applejack: I say we go to Yakyakistan right now and make her come back home!
Twilight Sparkle: We can't just march up there and tell Pinkie what to do.
Fluttershy: [tearing up] But... we didn't even get a chance to say goodbye!
Twilight Sparkle: Well, we may not be able to go to Yakyakistan and force her to come home, but we could go say goodbye... and if we happen to mention how much her friendship means to us, and how much we'd miss her if she were gone forever, and then she decided to come back home on her own...
Rainbow Dash: Then what are we waiting around here for?! Let's get going to Yakyakistan!
Rest of the Mane Six: [cheering]
Rest of the Mane Six: [various yelps and whoas]
Twilight Sparkle: We're almost there.
Applejack: Pinkie's gotta be around here somewhere.
Fluttershy: But where?
[distant yovidaphone playing]
Rarity: Is that...?
Twilight Sparkle: The music of the yovidaphone.
Rainbow Dash: Are you sure? Because that actually sounds kinda... good.
Twilight Sparkle: Oh, I'm sure. Come on.
[yovidaphone playing]
Rainbow Dash: Huh. Not what I expected.
Yaks: Shhhh!
Rainbow Dash: Oh, sorry.
Yaks: Shhhhhhh!
Rainbow Dash: [hushed] I said I was sorry!
Fluttershy: [hushed, gasps] There she is!
Pinkie Pie: [gulps] [despondent] Gimme another.
Yak waiter: But pony already had twenty-five ice—
Pinkie Pie: I said, gimme another!
Twilight Sparkle: [grunts] Pardon me!
Applejack: Excuse us.
Rainbow Dash: Oh, uh, sorry!
Pinkie Pie: [despondent] I feel nothing.
Twilight Sparkle: Maybe we can help with that.
Pinkie Pie: [despondent] Oh. Hey. What are you guys doing here?
Applejack: Just hear us out.
Rainbow Dash: We respect your decision to move to Yakyakistan.
Twilight Sparkle: But we just wanted to remind you how much you mean to us, and how much we'd miss you if you decided to move here for—
Pinkie Pie: [despondent] Fine. I'll move back to Ponyville.
Rainbow Dash: Wow. That was a lot easier than I thought. We're awesome!
Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie, what's wrong?
Pinkie Pie: [despondent] That's what's wrong. I thought coming here and listening to real yovidaphone playing would make me happy.
[yaks applauding]
Pinkie Pie: [despondent] It makes me feel worse. I'm never gonna sound like that.
Yigrid: Yovidaphone fan pony watch instrument while Yigrid visit little yak's room?
Pinkie Pie: [despondent] Eh. If I can't play it, I might as well do menial chores for those who can.
Applejack: Okay, so Pinkie Pie is obviously still miserable.
Fluttershy: Oh, I can't bear to see her like this.
[yovidaphone honks]
Rarity: Indeed. But what else can we do?
[yovidaphone honks]
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, we've tried everything!
Fluttershy: Maybe not. Look!
[yovidaphone honking]
Pinkie Pie: [stifled giggling] Whoops! Sorry!
[yovidaphone honking]
Pinkie Pie: I forgot what an awful yovidaphoner I am.
Twilight Sparkle: Playing it makes you so happy.
Pinkie Pie: [wistfully] [sighs] It sure does. I mean... it did.
Twilight Sparkle: Then you should never stop.
Rarity: So say we all!
Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash, under: [sounds of agreement]
Applejack: Absolutely.
Pinkie Pie: But... you were the ones who told me to stop because I wasn't good.
Twilight Sparkle: And we were wrong.
Fluttershy: Playing makes you happy.
Rarity: And as long as it makes you happy, it doesn't matter how good you are!
Applejack: So get up there and show these yaks how it's done!
Pinkie Pie: [stage whisper] I don't know if you've noticed, but the audience are all yaks, and they kind of have "issues" with things that aren't perfect! Like my playing!
Rainbow Dash: Pinkie Pie, you get up on that stage and play. If these yaks don't like it, they'll have to answer to us!
Pinkie Pie: Well, okay... If you all say so...
Rainbow Dash: [clears throat] Ladies and gentleyaks! Performing for her very first time here, let's give a big round of stomps for... Pinkie Pie!
Pinkie Pie: [clears throat] Um, hi! So, uh, any yaks here from out of town?
[yak snorts]
Pinkie Pie: Ooookay. And a-one, and a-two, and I-kinda-remember-what-to-do... [inhales]
[discordant yovidaphone playing]
Twilight Sparkle: [grunts]
[chicken squawks]
Pinkie Pie: [gasps for breath]
[beat]
[yaks cheering]
Pinkie Pie: Uhhh, I kinda wasn't expecting this.
Rainbow Dash: Me, neither.
Yigrid: [stomps] Oh, pony play good set!
Pinkie Pie: You think so? Even though it wasn't perfect?
Yigrid: Yovidaphone is instrument of happiness. Playing yovidaphone make pony happy. Pony playing is perfect!
Pinkie Pie: Well if that's the case, lemme play you the song I just wrote two seconds ago! It's called "I've Got the Best Most Supportive Friends a Pony Could Ever Ask For"! [aside] It's a working title.
Twilight Sparkle: And a-one...
Applejack and Rarity: And a-two...
Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash: And a you-know-what-to-do!
Pinkie Pie: [inhales]
[yovidaphone plays until iris out]
[credits]