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  • Warning...this contains spoilers of the movie.  If you just want my score, go to the bottom.  Enjoy the read :3*

Well guys, this is it...

After all the fuss and turmoil for this movie, it has finally been available for everyone...in crappy quality XD.  And after seeing it, there is one thing that comes to mind.  A whole bunch of dancing!! singing!!  AND PAARRTIES

OK, it wasn't quite like that, but that would have made the movie ten times better.  I plan on doing a better analysis when a clearer edition comes out, but for now, lets talk Equestria Girls.  What can I say about this movie that hasn't been said already.  Well the best way is to look at this spectical of a movie is realize something right when you see it.  This movie was just made for references....and boy were they some of the most pandering references I've seen in this series.

Lets talk about what I liked first:

-I liked the bits with Spike being...well...Spike.  I've finally calmed down from...well...these kind of comments but I still hate that he's a dog.  Though I will say he was probably the only thing in the movie that at least made me crack a smile.

-I liked how they managed to make the personalities of the characters stick.  This is an alternative world with same personalities...sort of.

Another positive...huh...

-Oh yeah, I did kind of like the music pieces during the lunchroom thing.  It reminds me of the one or two High School Musical songs I actually liked (only 2 guys :P).

And.....well....that's kinda it.  What it did have in advantage is it's similarity to FIM for the most part.  It was cute and campy.  It didn't try to reboot or change much or any of that BS Man of Steel tried to do, so it's actually better then most would expect.  But that's not saying much; that's like saying the shot you got today is less painful than the one you got a week before.  I wasn't impressed with this movie much; it didn't look or feel like something that needed to be in theatres.  And I know what the writers tried to do, they tried to put in references and little tidbits to entice and make you forget you're watching a subpar movie.  But they failed to realize that not everyone is swayed by keys dangling in front of their face.  The story is kind of boring really; they tried to mask it with the whole "be back by sunset or you're doomed" hook, but it wasn't really captivating IMO.  Now to get to the things that boggled me.

-Why the hell would you leave an important crown lying on the countertop?  And for that matter, what were the gaurds doing when Sunset broke in!?  Shining needs to get fired

-Celestia doesn't seem to give two tits about Sunset really and her backstory is just there to drive the story of her being the villian.  Imagine if Shifu was like "Oh Tai Lung, yeah I used to know him but he's evil now.  Go Po, my new favorite!"  There's no real attachment or despair in Celestia (how fitting)

-The principles suck at their jobs.  That's the one thing you weren't supposed to mirror from the show (oh snap did I just say that out loud XD!?).  How do you not realize Sunset is terrorizing an entire school.

-Why are Snips and Snails evil?  They are retarded followers who admire, they aren't supposed to be the stereotypical sidekick villians!

-Did it never occur to the other 5 that they could have asked each other why they didn't do what they promised instead of assuming that they were being jerks!?

-Sunset is the worst villian in FIM history.  She's worse then Sombra; at least he tried to be menacing and was forboding.  How do you go demonic, get beaten in three seconds, and then cry like a baby asking for forgiveness (THEY FORGIVE HER TOO!!) and expect me to even respect you.  In fact, how did you use the crown?  What is the limit to the Elements because this was straight up Deus Exing

-This line: "Equestria can find a way without this element there"...Um, Twilight, you and Celestia made a big fuss about the Element of Magic being the most powerful and useful.  So, without that your friends would sorta FREAKING FAIL!  Celestia and Luna aren't going to help much either, so you're kind of important (unfortunately) in that plan.  If there were other ways, why did you have to reverse the spell in Return of Harmony and use your element to fix the spell in MMC?

-Not telling anyone about the situation.  I know you have to drag the story on but this could have been resolved by telling them what was going on earlier.  You can avoid looking crazy by, IDK, having Spike talk!!  You have a talking dog, I'm sure you could convince them!

-The last 13 minutes were terrible, but we'll talk about that in greater detail another day (when a better version comes out)

Flash is boring btw...soooo boooring

So that leaves a final verdict.  They tried their best, and I give them that.  But ultimately this isn't the "memorable motion picture" that will be talked about much after this.  So my final verdict is a 5/10.  And before you fanboys go apes**** on me, I urge everyone who hasn't to at least watch the pirate version because it isn't a terrible movie.  "But DT, you gave it a 5/10!".  Yeah, cause it was an average film.  What it did right it did phenominally well.  And what they did wrong...well...they just couldn't polish the turd enough.  And I don't blame the writers for this; Hasbro is having too much input on what the series is doing and not letting the writers flurish and make the creative series Lauren intended.  But I will say this about EG...it's competant.  Other then the many gripes I had with it, I didn't feel like gouging my eyes out after watching it...I just don't have much desire to watch it again.

This won't be a substitute by any standards until season 4, and let me ask you all...did you truely like the story, or were the camios/shoutouts the only reason you enjoyed it as much.  If it's the later, you might want to rewatch withouth your fan goggles on (it's hard I know; I almost gave this higher for cute Sparity moment XD).  But if you went and bought this, you can live in confort that you could have done a hell of a lot worse.  You could have done better , but hey it's your money :P

Equestria Girls second movie poster

Well...at least I didn't die