Welcome back to your XCOM report. We didn't have a really good start this time. We..once again, let another UFO get away from us. But even with our loss, we still had work to do. Our boss gave us another special mission. This time we weren't looking for a friend...we were looking for cartel...in Mexico!
Now, you might be wondering why we were looking for some cartel in Mexico (I know RP surely was), but we don't question the guy who funds our operations, so we just went with it. So we were off to do our mission...Operation Lone Knife (gotta love the guy who comes up with these names )
Anyways, this mission wasn't too much to scream at. We just fought a bunch of silly little sectoids and secured the dru...erm..cartel. So other than our two snipers playing George of the Jungle on the trucks...
Power: Weeee!! Hey, bet I can zipline to that blatant car advertisement.
Flame: Alright, let's do it!
...and EHAN blowing up a gas station...
EHAN: Hey Filly, how many cars do you think I can blow up?
Filly: IDK, maybe a row or two.
EHAN: Let's see what my rocket has to say!
Roadside: Aren't we supposed to be taking this mission seriously? We have to stay focused.
Filly: RP...we're fighting aliens that only do 2 damage to us. Even if we did get shot by them, it would only feel like a mosquito bite.
RP: Touche...okay fire at will >:3.
...the only other thing that happened was Nihi being a sneaky little devil, going ghost mode on a small group of aliens and throwing a plasma grenade at them.
Sectoid: Yo Ben and Moe, I found this magazine of Playcolt! You gotta come check it...
Sectoid: Ben? Moe? Oh god they're dead! I got to get out of here!!
But XCOM takes no prisoners, and just like that, the mission is over and we return with the spoils of war...along with a note from the store owner sueing EHAN for blowing up his station. We get our rewards, get our monthly report, and have nearly two weeks of inactivity...which means goofing off for a bit
Pinkie: Hey look, Shivey's stealing Filly's cake :3
Nihi: Yeah, I know..Filly got yanked by a robot. What a ham
But our fun didn't last too long as we had visitors...another UFO...and this time it wasn't getting away. Pinkie insisted piloting again with our new plasma beams added, so we just let him :P And finally, we managed to shoot it down! With the ship damaged, we gave Pinkie a break and sent the others on our toughest mission yet (or scariest at least). I mean...ook at the mission name...Devil's God. You think this name guy was just messing with us.
And wanna know why I say this was the scariest mission...well how about as soon as Power moves we get flanked by two heavy Mutons...none of which we have a good shot on :(. There is barely any cover, we have everyone in the open, and we're desperate...this is the time for Flame to actually hit something...a 55% shot...actually hit...but didn't kill. You were so close too but at least he backed off for a bit
Meanwhile, Nihi went ghosting to try to take the other one out. With those two out the way we tried to sneak into the ship...but we ran into an issue...two heavy floaters, a giant sectopod that would shoot the crap out of us, more heavy Mutons, and...an Ethereal.
Nihi: Wait...a what now 0.0?
Filly: A Ethereal. I've heard of these are even more powerful then those mind control sectoid bosses. They crush your sense, send you into a frenzy, and completely make you lose your humanity.
Nihi: In other words, they're another one of those mind raping things?
Nihi: That's it, I'm out.
And with bad memories flooding in, Nihi get's the hell out of that situation, opting to flank the back. Fortunately our snipers were there to hit, so we took it down. Those charging Mutons however, were kind of scaring me. I wasn't really faithful in Power's sniping skills at the moment, so I switched to the pistol, because surely you can never miss a 85% shot with a pis...wait you missed? . You never cease to amaze me Power. Flame took care of it (thank Luna) and now we had a giant robot that nearly blew Filly to kingdom come. We snuck in and...oh crap we were detected. This was bad. The sectopod shoots EHAN and does extreme damage, but thanks to that armor.
Can't say the same for Power...she was the next target, and with not enough health to live through it, it was certainly the end for...wait wait hold the phones...it missed? At point blank!? Like I said, Power never ceases to amaze me. She can't shoot with any weapon we give her, but she can dodge a point blank cannon and not die...more than two times!
But I'm sure she wasn't going to get lucky again, so we needed to take it out. With all our fire power and all our strenght, we took this bad boy down, leaving Power with her most successful mission yet..misses first shot.
Like I said...most successful mission yet (Power finishes it off with the second shot).
Now we survived the scariest mission of our lives...and with a new alien artifact that looks like a giant glowing jawbreaker, we might have a chance with the upcoming forces. Meanwhile, back in generals office, me and the guy I lead see a giant alien ship floating overhead...this can only mean one thing...giant cargo dealers >:(
But we'll worry about that another day, because for the first time in the history of history...EHAN finally gets hurt. And to add a small bit of irony, he's the only one in the OR XD!
Filly: So...what was that about being made of steel again
EHAN: Oh hahahahaha! I have a hole in my chest from an alloy cannon you &^(%*%$&% !!!!!!!
No matter, we have to disect ourselves a specimen..and you know what that means.
Nihi and Filly take out radioactive waste after the autopsy! They can't complain, they're getting mind sheilds later.
Will EHAN be in action before the next attack? Will the ships attack our base? How much more can Filly and Nihi die from radiation poison? Will Power finally learn to shoot things? Find out some (but not all) answers on the next XCOM report.