- What can I say?
- It was a good run.
- Even though it was much shorter than I'd have preferred.
Honestly I don't see why Celestia had to put her nose into it. Equestria needs chaos. It needs me. A world without Discord isn't a world. It's – goodness, I'm going to have to say it – unbalanced. She out of everypony should understand that. After all, she knows exactly what an unbalanced world is like. After what happened to her sister.
Let me clear something up right here right now: I had nothing to do with her. I merely sat on the sidelines and watched as little Luna turned the world upside down. Cheering her on, of course. Sadly Celestia went and ruined it all – again – before I could release myself, Luna went to the moon, and where was I? Stuck. I never saw Luna this time. I suppose Celestia was keeping her safe. And Canterlot castle has many magic barriers; though snatching the Elements of Harmony was child's play, it was pushing my ability to actually appear inside. I'd have worn the barriers down with time – I was so close to a repeat of the magical explosions that happened a few years ago which nearly destroyed them. Sadly it was not to be.
You lose track of time as a statue. Days become years, generations in the blink of an eye. I'm not quite sure how long it was between my imprisonment and release, although I get the impression it was a very, very long time. And I'm grateful. No, really. Because with every day, every year that I was trapped in that blasted statue garden, I learned. Oh, I learned. And everything I learn can be put to good use. Before I was imprisoned, I was great. Any pause of any length of time and I knew what I was going to do and I knew what everypony else was going to do before they'd even considered it. Give me those many years... I'm unstoppable.
I had it coming, I knew that much, I just didn't see it coming so soon. I – and this is not something I say lightly – I underestimated those ponies. Twilight Sparkle in particular. Oh, I knew Celestia would have a failsafe, but in all the years I've known her I would have thought she'd put it into action herself. And I knew about the friendship reports, of course, and that dragon.
- Not tampering with the dragon is a decision I now regret.
And now I'm back where I began, immortalized in stone. A better pose would have been nice, I must admit, but even I cannot have everything. That's not fun. When you have everything, nopony has anything with which to try and rise up with, and you can't have the fun of squashing their hopes like standing on an apple and watching the juice fly everywhere.
They chose not to put me back in the statue garden. A sensible idea I suppose; they don't know how I escaped, but clearly they're not taking any chances. Instead I'm here, locked in some dungeon deep under Canterlot. A pity. Now the next time I escape, and I will escape, mark my words, I won't know where to begin. Last time I had a labyrinth. Now... nothing. I can still entertain myself with my mind, of course, but what fun is entertainment when there's nobody there to take the fall for you?
Another thought occurs to me – I never got to thank those three little fillies who aided my release. I would still have escaped eventually, it was inevitable, but they greatly accelerated the process. Well. My top hat is off to you three young ladies. You showed me that despite all the... harmony, there is still chaos. Dark in the light. Imbalance. Imperfection. Proof that I'm still around.
- I'm Discord.
- And I'm still here.
- I'm always here.